I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Randomize
