put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize
