Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize