We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
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