wat bout pragnant strippers??
If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Randomize
