she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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