The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
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