just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
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