So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
Randomize
