I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Randomize
