one two three fourrrrnication!
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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