He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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