Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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