Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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