you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
No subtext here. People are naked.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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