Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
time to smoke my breakfast
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
I still have a little drunk in my system
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
