I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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