You're completely useless in the revolution.
cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Randomize
