Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Randomize
