He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
