i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
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