Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
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