After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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