You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Randomize
