I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
P.S. I can't hear my feet
well you can't waste a boner
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Randomize
