What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
Randomize
