i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I looked at my own cervix.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
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