Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
ttyl tear gas
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
