so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
