no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
