weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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