good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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