was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
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