ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Randomize
