So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
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