Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
being pregnant is like rehab
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
