Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
