North Korea, Best Korea!
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Randomize
