My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
Randomize