if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Randomize
