You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
