Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
