U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
i came on her dog
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
