She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
