don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
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