I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
How does one acquire holy water?
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Randomize
