so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize
