How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Randomize
