i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
