At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
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