yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
